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Poetry 2007 - Sorted By Date

December 2007

Only In A Dream

Only in a dream is where I feel the most alive,
alive only to live the life I've always wanted,
wanting the bad to leave this dream in peace
peace I have but only in a dream.
Dream,
I'm dreaming of being with the person I love the most,
most of all I dream of being free,
free to spread my wings and fly
fly away to a place where I could be me
me I tend to find and seek
seeking to find...that I could be me,
but only in a dream.

In My Dream

A day a night
A tear a cry
Wind blows in my eye
Furious and fried
Whenever whoever
Today or tommorow
I will never let go
Of the things and the sorrow
My friend my love
My heart my soul
You dwell so much
That you mold
Into my heart where
You will stay
Here today and everyday
Say those three words
That will get me back to
Focus with that being said
I'll be happy you're dead
No not really I'll be happy
That you said I LOVE YOU
To me so that means my dream
Came true where I was with you
And you were with me together
In my dream.

The Clown

I am a clown whose eyes are full of madness,
whose intentions are full of disgrace,
And whose actions are very irresponsible.
Above all I am a clown that cannot seem to find the way to light,
For I've been lost in the same dark forest before at night.
I am a clown whose sense of humor has long disappeared,
And now you can only see in me a very unpleasant impression,
And my make-up all smeared.
The very same clown that is rude and maliciously evil,
The clown with the grin on its face and a nightmare is made.
And when all that seems to be lost in me
A lugubrious thought races to my mind,
And then I realize how obsolete of a clown I've been.
To all the people around the world this poem is for you
Because now you have a clown with a deceiving look
and a foreshadowing background that swirls.

Untitled

What do you think when you se me walking down the row,
With my head down and eyes on my toes.
I'm probably viewed as guilty until proven innocent,
Your the judge and my haters are the witnesses. You're a spineless person,
Oh yes you are with your mindless dictionary and your lying jar.
I don't need your love because you're worth nothing at all.
I was very misunderstood with every word I said to you, and the sad thing is it was all true,
But you mixed it up and turned it into something that fit you right.
You made it sound like I started the fight with yourself, babe I think you need mental help.
HA...It's all so true everything just goes right through.
All well, just keep on putting those lies in your jar until they leak out and show who you really are.
It really sucks because these words don't mean a thing, they're just my heart on a page.
But soon it'll come out these letters will mean something,
And when your words won't hit my face those words bruise me,
Scare my heart,
And every part of me rips apart and makes me bleed,
Sometimes I wish people could hear me cry because of all the pain I feel inside. You're like cancer you won't go away,
My confidence is bald, my heart is thirsty but it will never be quenched, because you're always the one who drains it away
My life is siphoned out of my veins.
I'm lying here happiness is like a breath it's taken away,
Because you caused me so much Pain.
Life sucks,
And love really hurts
Well, lets move on to the next jerk.

November 2007

False Memories

A trickling stream of endless memories goes through the mind,
At one point, they turn towards the heart,
Some memories are held there, kept there for as long as the heart beats.
Others go through the system and are eventually used or disposed of.
What determines what is to be remembered?
For, more often than not, even if we want to remember a feeling forever, we can't.
And other times we want to forget something as soon as it happens, yet we can't.
The memories here are mixed in with fantasies,
And the heart is malfunctioning; it can't sort the reality from the fiction.
Or is that the way it should be?
Dreams are kept here, or are they a part of the memory?
Did that really happen? Is everything too good to be true?
Does the heart manufacture its own sort of band-aids?
Were you there? When was the last time I saw you?
In my memory I see you every night.
In my visions I know that's not true.
You love me in my hallucinations,
But does that prove factual in any sort of way?
What is it I'm supposed to find in these recollections?
Is there something kept here, something important?
My heart, do you hold the answers?
Or do you hold only the questions?
Here lies the truth; here I keep the lies,
The river only overflows, mostly with moments shared with you.
Or are those only fantasies?
Did I ever really know you?
For I know I love you,
Yet I my enchantments are so sensual,
It seemed you where there when I know you were not.
I love you, more than anything; my memories are full of you,
Yet, did you ever really exist at all?
Are you just my wildest dream, never meant to come true?
Maybe you're just a figment, forever wandering through my false memories.

Untitled

I never thought
until this day
I was as beautiful
as they say
until the day he came along
we went together
like a song
he tells me I'm gorgeous
he tells me I'm fun
right then I knew
he'd be the one
he likes me for me
and that I love
he's heaven sent
right from above

October 2007

Never See Me Cry

No matter how bad I hurt
I won't let you see me down
Cause once I show my weakness
You push me to the ground
You take away my essences
And leave me here to die
No matter how bad I hurt
you'll never see me cry

Untitled

These streets are never quiet
Groups of people in a riot
You look for a place in the sky
But all you see is buildings growing seemingly high
Unfriendly faces push their way through the crowd
I try and cry out but the noise is so oppressively loud
A taxi driver is repeatedly honking his horn
While his fists out the window - his face a scorn
Suddenly out of no where comes my long lost friend
She yells out for me and tells me what's in her head
Her thoughts pertain to her new found home
How she loves sleeping in this city of neon and chrome
The people are interesting and uniquely new
She pointed out a man whose shirt was completely askew
Three women passed us by as we liberated on
I watched them as they walked so gracefully -- But soon they were gone
We turned a corner to her favorite café
It was French and different in a way
People were toasting with crystal in their hands
Dancing in their chairs as if there was music playing from some bands
A quiet old couple was perched out on the deck
Their hands were wound as he gently kissed her neck
My friend poured me a glass of her favorite wine
We sipped the crispy, musky taste until the sun didn't shine
Soon the city was lit like a Christmas tree
We ran through the streets, oh how I felt so free!
I wanted to look up and twirl with the stars above me
When suddenly I realized I couldn't see any with all the bright lights
I paused for a moment and took a deep breath of air
Then turned to my friend and thanked her for all she did share
I explained to her how I just suddenly felt
That without the stars my heart would simply melt
Her city was beautiful in its own way
But deep inside me was a voice saying I couldn't stay
So I packed my things and called for a yellow taxi
For tonight I would be back home
Looking in the sky's galaxy

Break Free

Let your soul break free
Break free from reality
Swim in a sea of a galaxy
Fall in love with a shooting star
Play the rings of Saturn like a guitar
Sleep in the blue hue of the clouds
Listen to the silent sounds
Flying through the black nights
Watching the stars glow like candle lights
Soaring on the wings of dreams
Anything is possible if you just believe

Untitled

Yellow blue purple green those are all colors that are in between. Orange pink gray and red those are all colors that will soon be straight ahead. The wind swings well everyone sings giving great joy to every girl and boy. The sky is blue and everyone says I love you to their young for tomorrow will be a war that not no one had sung for war just began so what will they do they go away and just pray to god that he will save the day. Little poor Mary looked up in the sky and prayed so hard it made her cry because she knew she would be saved for god said not today for today you will be ok for tomorrow will there be no war for tomorrow was going to be a special day for tomorrow was Jesus's birthday.

Who are you...

Why do I care so much about what you think?
Everything you say, and everything you do makes me envy you so much,
but why do I repeat everything you say in my head all night long?
Why is it that anything you say I do, or think it's right?
Why do you seem to care so much about me, but when I need you most you're not there?
Do you know how much it would mean to me if you were actually there just once?
You have the potential to make me happy, change me, and make sure I do something good with my life.
But why do you always break me, let me down, rip me apart?
The thing that hurts the most is you have no idea how much you mean to me.
Regardless of whether you do good, or bad, I'll be okay, I'll get over it.

Blood vs. Water

Blood is thicker than water.
Whoever said that well, I say
this, blood was thicker than
water, now it seems like blood
is just getting thinner and thinner,
and water is all that's real.

Blood is thicker than water.
Whoever said that well, I say
this, blood was thicker than water,
in these days blood is quicker to
stab you in the back than water,
yet we still live blood for blood and,
water for water.

Blood is thicker than water.
Whoever said that, well I say
this, in my life water is all that's real,
I just wish my blood hadn't cut my wrists,
and drained all its value from me.

So, blood is thicker than water.
Well whoever said that I say this,
blood was thicker than water, now
water is all that's real.

Long Time

So many times I say your name,
each time I feel the pain
A love lost and a mind that went half insane.
Though through the nights I feel the presence we had once shared
A love only few could bear.
Hardly we would fight, the sexy calls late at night.
but the immaturity of a young lady in love
every situation I added more than what there was
Fighting for which way only living day to day.
Knowing he was my first, and he was my love
Letting immaturity rise above.

Friends

We all have changed
We have moved on
Those ties we had
now come undone

We wish we'd keep in touch
We want to say so much
But we've moved on
And nothing's the same
We grow apart a little more each day

Those parties, dances we attended
Are now stored inside our mind
Those laughs and stories that we shared
Are just the shadows of the past

Like jig-saw pieces
we all broke off
And no one knows if ever
our puzzle will be put back together

But all I know
True friends like us
Will never really grow apart

So keep in touch
and now and then
remember good friends 'till the end.

Undertow

Im being pulled under
By the oceans undertow
Its pulling me down and sinking me low
I try to cry out I try to scream
I wish it all were just a dream
I think all the way back to all my life
The joy, the happiness, and even the strife.
No I do not want my life to end now!
However I realize that I am to drown.
I am thankful for that life of mine.
And slowly I sink and I finally die.
So this is a lesson from me to you.
Cherish your life with all that you do.
So if you are in that position like mine.
You will know that you lived your life fine.
Though I will miss you all with deep regret,
The life I had I will never forget.

September 2007

Bullet Wound

you shoot me with your evil words
almost everyday
it's something mean all the time
like you know nothing nice to say
your words are bullets, you're the gun
you shoot me continuously
your shots leave wounds in my heart
so I soon must flee
you'll wound my heart to a bloody pulp
if I can't avoid your shots
I've been thinking and scheming every day
of quick but effective plots
I must choose to get away from you
and your shots of pain and sorrow
I won't see you later today
and I won't see you tomorrow
I must heal my bleeding heart
with a healing kiss
but I won't get that kiss from you
because you left me with this...
a permanent place in my heart
where you left a bullet wound

Spirit

Today a life is born as a chain that will never end. today a love is born, a love which is of purity. Today a spirit has come alive, a spirit that has been sent upon a miracle. Today a memory is made, a memory which will always be with us. Today is a day life will change, today is a day of which will be cherished and its memories will go on and on from the chain of life that was born upon it.

For my dearest darling cat barbie and her kittens I wrote this poem as I took care of her while she was giving birth, now she is in a better place, I dedicate this to her.

Knock Knock

As time goes on I sit and wait
for time to pass oh please don't be late
a knock at the door I wonder who is there
no one but my prince charming, my love to be
the love of my life the one for me.

If Only

Why did say goodbye
If only I could smile
and wish you were here
And stay for a whilev
If only your eyes
were as bright as the sun
our love has not ended
it's just begun

If only our love
was as big as the world
You'd be my man
I'd be your girl

Love Is

Love is what
does it only mean to kiss or hug
No, its just affection that gets to you
when you love someone
its like a bomb goes off in your heart
a love bomb and it never stops ticking
you can't force your love.
before it comes back to you and you're
THINKING
THINKING
about what love is
what is love

Untitled

These I have loved:
Fear. And depression; anger, heartbreak
The helplessness in emptiness
Pounding rain, Indian love songs, bison extinct,
The radiance of fire stones, streaming red rivers.
Permeating cow manure with hay, the flipping of ancient pages of shabby books,
The sweat-filled, bright lights of gyms; airless, diamonds in the rough,
Power of a waterfall, gliding through sediment; vapor transforming beauty
The velvety snow, whiteouts five feet high, freezing, stunned by firelight,
Blue crystals in the basin of Tahoe, petrified numb,

The enchantment of mist, African grass Oh that dances when God blows!
The cold kiss of the wind, sadness of tears, salt
Ironclad clouds forming, orange, citron, red, bright pink of sunsets new.
Desire, the long notes of an Irish flute; gloom, the deadliest catch, peacock seas,
The poison of faith, an early wet morning, charcoal eyes that burn,
Broken promises, traitors with passion; fairy dust, blood suckers of the night,
Eight hundred year old twigs two hundred fifty feet high, seduction,
Longing to the fullest, that waft of cinnamon during Christmas,
Nervous butterflies; crushed minds turned to dust,
Twisted thoughts, random rays of the sun,
The mysteries of tornadoes, four-a-clocks, the elegance of a full moon,
Golden eagles, soaring hawks, Aristotle, Zeus, the magnificence of Greek mythology, Wondrous; sorrow and joy in its wild tantrums, sand too gritty, the sapphire blues intertwined in violent violets of midnight; winking stars,
The intoxication of his fingers, indulgent depths of despair.

My loves of great numbers yet, my mood,
Raw.
Like my soul.

Fragile.

Just Right

You know when they are wrong for you, we call them our rivals
You know when they are a little too much of something, we call them show-offs
You know they're too crazy, we call them...well, CRAZY!!!
You know when they're just right, perfect in every way
We call them FRIENDS!

Angels

Sometimes God sends down angels
We call those angels friends

Daring

I was wrong for loving you
Wrong for caring
Wrong for being there
Wrong for daring


Daring to Love You
Daring to Care
Daring to be there
Daring to Dare

August 2007

I Miss Him

My love
That I first experienced when I was young
Was taken from me
Like a rug snatched from under my feet
I cared for him so deeply inside
So that the feeling is still burning
After two years of my life have gone by
I miss the touch
Of his warm soft skin
And when his arms wrapped around me
When we said goodnight
I miss the color of his eyes
They were like the sun so bright
I miss the sweetness of his heart
It was like I had just eaten candy
It was horrible when I had to part
It was like sitting at a beach
That was no longer sandy
I miss him to this day
And forget him I'd never
I miss him to this day
My heart is his forever

Taken From The Start

I want him
He makes me feel good
I want him
I would have him if I could
But he's been taken from the start
If only I could have his heart
I thought he would leave her
For what we could have been
But now I know I can't have him
He's been taken from the start
We used to have that connection
It was good while it lasted
I used to love his affection
But all those feelings are in the past
Why didn't I realize it
When I had the chance
Why didn't I realize it
Now I can't even get a glance
I guess it's true
That you don't realize what you've got til it's gone
Cause now I see what could have been
He could have been the one

Played

Too many times I have cried
I think my heart has died
I though you were true
But you played me like a fool
I now recognize the game
And a imprint of your name is on my brain
I wont forget how you did me wrong
And how for you I played only sad songs
But it's not all your fault
It's your lies that I bought
I realize how fake people can be
Now my only real best friend is me

If I Were A Bird

If I were a bird I would fly high in the sky,
I would soar through the air and not care,
No one would stop me from going too high,
If I were a bird I would fly so high.

If you were a bird you would fly in the sky,
You would soar in the air and not care,
No one would stop you from going too high,
If you were a bird you would fly so high.

Untitled

Love. The extraordinary and perfect complacency of one's deepest heart. Whether you're a youth or fully grown, love can come in all prodigious ways. It's not just that feeling we have, it's the benevolence and service we are willing to do for one another. The explicit expression when someone is in love is simply unforgettable to the eye. It's not always what you give and what you take to prove your love, but rather the sincere clemency of what you see that person in your heart. Your heart should always be willing and ready to help that person in times of tribulation, needs and care. Even if they go through battles and controversies, each one of them just hangs on tighter and never lets go.

When the whole world doubts your love for each other, they get closer and closer everyday. As time begins to pass by, your love getting as clear as luminous night sky. It's the new beginning and an everlasting end. Love lasts forever.

Untitled

Show me the way into your heart.
I can barely stand being apart.
Day after day I wonder what you think.
Should I wear yellow or should I wear pink?
I know nothing about you, but I want to know more.
Only you can open the door.

Untitled

I said what I meant
and I meant what I said
this feeling of love will never be dead
I'll love you when your heart is shattered
and has even lost its way

but love is never lost
it always finds a way
so when it meets the darkness,
so enough it meets the day
when you cry, I cry... I feel your pain
the light will shine through even in the rain
when I feel you, you feel me... you know what I am thinking
and to have a love like that
makes my heart beat fast
cause I know this love we have
is forever gonna last

Freedom

When the wind moves
It does not only lighten up
The faces upon the earth
It picks them up into the minds
of freedom

We all wonder freedom
For the two seconds
It possesses our minds
Take hearts into mind
When the wind finishes
Think of others
Their freedom
Their world
Then think of yours
Is it ever equal?
No.
Freedom only comes
To those who feel the wind

40 Acre Rock

rivers running
trees swaying bugs
bugs are all around

Summer Love

When I first saw you I knew you would be mine.
but the thought never came that it would end soon.
we were together you said it was always and forever.
now its never ever.
we had so many good times and no bad.
now I'm here oh so sad.
I can't eat.
I cant sleep.
I dont know how to live.
but I know one day we'll be together and we'll be forever and ever.

so never forget me summer love
for you are always on my mind...

July 2007

Untitled

My life seems so slow
But everything around me is fast everywhere I go
Nothing can ever get in its way
Can I live for love or fall down and pray
I sit in the lobby for ideas and vacations
Cause when I'm grown I'll change the nation
My personality is colorful and my appearance is weak
my friend is the same but she shows it
She is waiting for me and she knows it

I Don't Understand

I don't understand
Why we all just can't get along
The meaning of war
Why we kill to make peace

I don't understand
Why love is so hard to find but so easy to make
Why every time you give your heart away it comes back in pieces
Why people say they need love to be happy but once they have it they throw it all away

I don't understand
Why some have everything while others have nothing
Why people won't give but they'll take
Why the real heroes go unnoticed while the celebrities are idolized

I don't understand
Why things happen the way they do
Why there is so much suffering in this world
This crazy world we live in

I don't understand

As You Sit There Smiling

As you sit there smiling
I stand here drowning in self pity
How could you do this to your daughter?
How could you make her hurt?
How could you make her feel like everything she ever did was wrong?
Like everything was her fault
As you sit there smiling
I stand here crying
You claim to love me and want what's best for me
But is it what's best for me or what suits your needs
How could you begin to know what is best for me when you don't even try to get to know me?
As you sit there smiling
I stand here screaming
I don't know how much more I can take of this
I want to leave this place and never come back
I need to break free of this pain
As you sit there smiling
I stand here dying
Days go by and I try not to feel the pain you are causing me
I've become numb to the sound of your voice
I can't live this way much longer for some day I'll explode
As you sit there smiling
I stand here drowning in self pity

Promises

Don't make promises you can't keep
Cuz there's a girl sitting here waiting to hear your voice
And those words she had once heard
She can't keep waiting forever
She's not going to waste her days waiting for a call
She needs more commitment in her life
If you're not going to stick around and give her the time of day
Then why should she?
Why should she wait around for you when she knows deep down that you won't make time for her?
She needs you now more than ever
But you're too blind to see that
So instead of waiting for days and days
She's giving up and moving on
'Cuz she's not going to waste her time on someone who can't find the time for her

Your Eyes

when I first saw your eyes
nothing else mattered
it was just me and you baby
all alone on this planet

you're as beautiful as a daffodil
oh I love you so
you're as graceful as a bird
but none of that matters cause it's just me and you baby
all alone
lost in your eyes
on the planet earth

Do You Remember?

Do you remember back in 4th grade?
When you were handsome and popular and smart
I was the one who saw you there but did you ever see me?
I was the one who was always there
I watched your every move, I knew who you were
I knew what you liked
I was the one who pretended not to care but I was always there

You looked right past me and fell in love with her
But I knew you were unhappy

Now 10 years later I look back and think
Do you remember?
Do you remember me?
I remember you
I loved you then
And I love you now

Your Love

It could shake the earth but then,
Your love is so calm
There would be peace on this earth
Your love takes over me
From time to time
I'd go crazy if you weren't mine
Your love is inside of me
It grows each day
So does my heart,
I hope you never take this love apart
Your love climbs all mountains
Overcomes all fears
Regrows my earth from field to field
It created a passion
It goes so deep it's stuck on repeat
Never to be moved, startled or interrupted
I'll hold your love for as long as I can manage
It's what I breathe, what I eat, what I drink
It controls my every move
Your love is so pure
It's now become me

June 2007

Forget Me Not

These years are starting to fly by
We're losing things we thought we'd have forever
Or at least 'til the end of life here.

Glance at those around you
The time is getting closer
For us to depart and say our last goodbyes.

We seem to have forever and a day
But we both know that's not true.
Hold on as we might it's time to let go

And it's terrible
For something that we all love so much to end.
But it's time
We can't control it anymore.

Regret not my dear friend
For I'll be here always
You of all people know where to find me.

It's that time
The time to take the pictures that remind us
Of that which is already lost.
And of that that is still to come.

Don't regret losing me
For sadness can do nothing for us.
I beg of you to spend your time with me before I depart.

Waste not and want not.
Never before and never again will that mean as
Much as it does now.

And as the years come to a close
I can ask nothing more of you than to
Forget me not dearest and to
Keep me in your heart

And your mind.
Think of me fondly
And of all that we've done together.

Talk of me to those you meet in passing
And hope for me
That the wind will carry your loving voice from your mouth

To my ever-waiting ears.
Think of me and I'll be with you.
Talk of me and I shall be there.

Yet do not mourn that I am no longer with thee.
If nothing else my dearest soul
Keep my memory alive with chatter and thoughts

Wherever you are
And whatever you do,
Forget me not
Forget me not.

Tonight

Talk to me
You seem so distant
Sing with me the time is fading

Dance with me for twilight
Is almost upon us.
I can feel you straying

Walk with me
I need you beside me
Tonight.

The todays are becoming tomorrows
I need you.
Just lie beside me
Tonight

You're fading
please don't go.
Not just yet

I've so much more to tell you
So much more to give
I'd stop time
If it meant we'd be together.

Find me
I'm lost in this darkness
that you created.

I need you
Just stay
tonight

The sun is setting
The time is coming
I still need you

Tonight is all we have
And it's crumbling
Beneath us.

I need you
Just give me tonight
Before we part forever

Give me tonight
To spend in your arms
As though time has almost run out.

I need tonight
Can't you see
The time has come.

I haven't got much longer
I need you
Tonight

Untitled

Wake me in the middle of the night
And we'll dance
To the music in our hearts that no one can hear
It's an insatiable need
For me to be near you
To feel your every move
For your every breath
To move through my hair.
Life will go on
But this dance is mine and yours
To remember always
As the night our hearts were finally one.
Your love is like air and
I need a breath
I'm alone without you here.
Dance with me
And I'll show you the world
That of which that will never let you forget
How we are
And sooner yet how we
were.
Time won't wait for you
To decide that it's time for this
Time to Dance to that music
And let our souls and
hearts be free.
Don't stop now
The tempo is beginning to swell
Need me like I need you
Want me like no other
Dance with me
If you can feel it.
If you can feel my pulse
Beat along with the rhythm
As you hold me so close.
It's our night
Dance with me
Before it's all over
The song's ending is approaching
Just let me feel your heartbeat once more
Before the orchestra in our hearts stops
For then it will be finally over
And I'm dreading the end
When the song decrescendos
To the point
Where I can't hear it anymore
I listen as best I can
But the song is fading
As is your love for me
And all that we had.
As the dance ends and we break apart
I beg of you my only one
To never forget this dance.

Untitled

Tears drip like water
Tears fall like rain
Tears show happiness
Tears show pain
Tears from the eyes
Tears are cover deep inside
Tears are see-through
My feelings aren't
Tears are salty as the blue lake sea
Tears sparkle in the sun
Tears twinkle in my eyes at night

It's Hard

life is one of the hardest thing to control
life is the most difficult thing to change
life sucks 50% of the time
life is a gamble you lose some and you win some
life is so short
life to us is a joke we don't take it seriously
life can change on you like family and friends
life makes it own rules
if you don't follow them you lose

May 2007

Untitled

These days, they go by so slow
what could have been, we'll never know
as every day will slowly pass,
I sit and think in the cool green grass
I sometimes think of me and you
in the summer, just us two
on the dock, by the beach,
teenage love barely out of reach
the waves still crash, the wind still blows,
the sand still feels good underneath my toes
but somehow something's missing.
I somehow feel all empty
like a summer day without the breeze
thinking of you, I still go weak in the knees
if you were still here, right here with me
I'd love just as you loved me
But the days have gone by the summer has passed
I guess good things just never last.

The Spider

A little tiny spider
Outside my window
On a strand of the finest silk
It sways in the wind of a thousand storms
Branches are breaking
Trees are bending
And this spider,
Like a little speck against the ominous sky,
Is hardly swaying a bit
The tread is so small it's see-through
And to think...
I squished one yesterday

The First Time

The first time I saw you
My eyes grew very huge and wide
The first time I saw you
I wanted to be by your side

The first time I saw you
My jaw just dropped
The first time I saw you
My heart had stopped

The first time I saw you
I thought nothing could go wrong
The first time I saw you
I could just burst into song

The first time I saw you
Only you were in my mind
The first time I saw you
I could tell you were my kind

The first time I saw you
I knew god sent you from above
The first time I saw you
I realized I was in love

I Miss You

I think about our glory days
When everyone smiled
When the sun rejoiced with the moon

I count the days
The minutes
The hours
When you'd actually admit

You're so wrong
I'm so right
Life has taken flight

It's lost in the wind
I'm lost in your soul
Some things are best left untold

I miss you
But I still hate your guts
You miss me
And hate me completely

Those days aren't worth looking back to anymore
Because I forgot them already
You and me
Now it's just me

All this talk about love
And yet none know the truth
Because they don't

And yet I still want to remember
Those flowery days
When the sun danced with the moon
And we rejoiced under them

April 2007

The Wind

As the trees are ruffling,
And the smell gets stronger,
The sound starts to get louder.

I can feel something brush upon my skin.
I look, and nothing is there, no one is there.

I then begin to realize,
Something else is there besides me.
I know what it is now.

It is the wind that is making all the fuss.

The Dr. Seuss Way

Solla Sollew is the place you want to be
When life has you trapped and you want to be free

When you go everything will be alright
You just got to stay strong and hold on tight

Life will be better, just wait and you will find
Hunches that want to help are inside your mind

Hunches will lead you the way out of strife
Hunches will help you find good things in life

Oh the places you'll go are so brand new
You'll see pink skies and oceans of bright blue

You might even meet a brand new person that
Will make people smile, like the Cat in the Hat

He's a silly cat who likes to have fun
He will turn rainy clouds into the sun

So take a visit to Solla Sollew
And all your wildest dreams will come true

Sweet Summer

Flowers and
Grass
Sun at full blast
That is what I call
A sweet summer

Mangos watermelon and some
Sugar canes
Swimming in the water
On a beautiful beach
That is what I call
A sweet summer

Girls in skirts
and some short short shorts
Boys in wife beaters and some 3/4 pants
Come on over
There's a really hype dance!

No more sitting home
watching B.E.T
Eating more then you need to

Come on
Get up
Go outside
'Cuz let me tell you
It's a real sweet summer!

To My Cousin

It's gone so fast since the first time we met,
rolling in sand and playing Batman.
we'd spend all day dreaming of what we'd become,
a famous musician, doctor, or even actor.
Now it seems our dreams fade away,
like our relationship from being like sisters to so far apart.
I love to think about you'll always be in my heart.

Shiny Star

You came to me
When I needed a friend
Like a brother you stand
With me till the end

Helping me to see light
I've been in the dark too long
Giving me love and hope
Reasons to carry on

Giving me your courage
Smiling now when I rise
From wisdom you shared
Sparkle returned to my eyes

Your shoulder I lean on
You're my shining star
You lend me your strength
Lifting me up from afar

How do I thank you
For what you've given me
Words do not seem enough
For what you made me see

So just for you alone
My arms I do extend
Giving you all my love
Forever my big brotherly friend, my friend to the end

Guardian Angel

A guardian angel is to protect and love
A true friend sent from above
We protect each other from our fears
We wipe each others tears
We have a lot of fun
We fix what each has done
We are meant to be friends
This special friendship never ends
Whatever lies ahead
We'd handle it together instead
We'd never be alone
protecting each other until our names are engraved in stone

2007

2007 is a good year
but it would be better if the world could get along through the years
no more shootings or murders
all would be well if every one cared
do you see the years going by fast and it gets worse
this world is coming to nothing but hateness
if we all just loved as God wants us to then the world would be a better place to live

Forever and a Day

We did so much to make this work
These last three years were filled with hurt
and just as things were going easy
THEY TOOK YOU AWAY FROM ME!
There seems to be no way around it
I drive myself crazy just thinking about it
I want you to hold me every second of every day
but I can't seem to find a way
There seems to be no way around it
I drive myself crazy just thinking about it
I want you to be here when we say
I'll Love You Forever and A Day.

March 2007

You

Eyes beyond compare
Lips I want to wear
With just the right hair
Only mine not to share.
Arms of a fighter
Mind of a writer
Moves like a tiger
Smooth like water.
Perfect in all ways
Through the year in May
During the long day
Let's you and me roll in the hay.

Love Song

I cry, I weep,
At night I do not sleep.
I do not laugh,
I do not even giggle.
I do not care,
Not even one bit.
I glare upon those,
Who see me unfit.
I do not need it,
It being love.
I do not even,
Pray to God above.
My life has,
Always been wrong.
Just like,
Every love song.

Sing To Me

Sing to me a sweet song of sorrow
Sing to me a lullaby
Calm me down, down to the earth
And meet you in my dreams
Sing to me a quiet tune
Sing to me a melody
And meet you in my dreams
Swift clouds abide me
Songbirds lull me to sleep
Someday I will meet my prince
And together we will sing
Sing to me a romantic song
Sing to me a little tune
Kiss my cheek and sing me to sleep
And meet you in my dreams

Once When I...

Once when I was very young I stuck a worm right on my tongue
I did not like the taste of it so I did not swallow it
But ooooo that made my mama squirm 'cause she thought
I ate that worm

I Found The Boi

I need a boi
to hold my hand
and though I'm cranky
he'd understand
I need a boi
who'd make me smile
and though it may sound stupid
I want him to
make me cry
I need a boi
who'd kiss my lips
make me shI'ver down to my finger tips
I need a boi
who'd hug me tight
and watch me sleep all through the night
I need a boi
to grow up with
and will never get tired
of being sweet
I thought I need a "boi" to complete me
but then you came, everybody agreed
that you're the one who made me smile
you're the one that made me cry
you're the one who understands
although you've never held my hand
I've never seen you
I have never hugged you
I've never looked into your eyes
but I know it'd feel like paradise
you're the best friend I never had
you're the only reason I feel sad
I wanna see you
I wanna hug you
I wanna kiss your forehead
whenever you get mad
although I have to wait to do all this
I just have to be content 'cause it's you
I miss for now
'cause I know someday
I'm not just gonna hear your voice on the phone
but I'm gonna hear you whisper in my ear
saying,
"Ill always be here, mah chiempmhunkieh"

Untitled

I know it doesn't matter now
'cuz we're not together
but I hope you don't mind knowing
these last things.
Every time I smiled at you
I hoped you would smile back.
Every time I said I loved you
I hoped you would say it back.
Every time I looked at you
I hoped you would look back.
Now I know that you didn't
and there's no sense being
with somebody who doesn't
love you back.

Memories

Every mile is another memory
How can I forget?
Just leave this town and all my regrets?
Let's walk these streets together
Baby, just one night
Walk hand in hand
You make it feel so right
Baby, one last time
Maybe just tonight
But we'll make it last forever, baby
If you hold me tight
Leave one last memory for this empty road
One last hand to hold
Baby, let our hearts unfold
Forget what we're told
Forget all our morals
And you don't have to worry
'Cause I'll never forget.
No I swear.
I'll never forget.

Untitled

I wished you were there
I think you just don't care
I hurt so much
I always feel like a pile of junk
I hate people judging me
I want to get up and leave
I want to start all over
I don't want to be a loner
I want a lot
I feel like I'm in a big knot
I want to be I want to be what other people want
I just can't!

A Love Poem

In my heart and in my soul,
You're the one who made me whole.
You had the touch of angel with soft light wings,
I hear your voice through and through it sings.
Your smile lifts me off my feet,
so cute, so kind and so so sweet.
You're the guy I love so dear,
but now I'm so sad because you're not here.
we smile together we cried together,
I love you all my life forever and ever.
You're my star in the sky,
the one I love passing by.
You're my star my sun and my moon,
I love you so much I'll be with you soon.
despite the pain you put me through,
I can't help but loving you!

Untitled

I sit and wait
For someone to hear me
But the more I hate
The less they come near me
I can't seem to stop
What I'm feeling inside
Oh, I wish I could stop
I wish I could hide.

Untitled

I can't be who you want me to be
nor do I want to
I don't understand why you can't see
I'm not you
You yell and scream and you see my tears
but you don't even flinch
I try to tell you how I feel
but you won't listen
You go to bed angry
I go sad
The next day you say you're sorry
and I forgI've
The same happens when I make one move wrong
The yelling starts again
I tell you I had enough but I'm pushed down again
I pack my bags in pure silence
I'm leaving this place
You say, "don't walk out that door!"
I don't listen
I run onto the icy streets
I forget my coat
I hear you're truck start up now
I begin to run faster
It's getting closer, I hear it
It pulls up beside me I hear you scream
Not with fear but anger
"How do you think this makes me look?" he yells at me
Instead I run faster
Then I trip
I hear a screech
Darkness

February 2007

Untitled

There was silence
I look at you as you look at me
Our hearts pounding oh so fiercely
CRASH
In that one moment everything changed
In a flash on an instant our whole lives got rearranged
Yet we just stood there and stared
As it fell to the ground
Broken
Shattered to a million shards all around
Left us with only painful wounds that are yet still bleeding
Here comes the shrieking
Crack voices
Weaken knees
Pure emotions falling
As it creates a bitter liquid melody
Screams of
"How could you let it fall?"
"Didn't it matter to you at all?"
"Or was this all just fake?"
Replied with a deafening echo of
"This is not right. We made a mistake."
"This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't pushed me that way"
The blaming went on
But who was to judge who was right or wrong
Over and over again rambling of nonsense
When will the truth arise?
But then again maybe it was all just lies.
Lost in a daze of confusion
We went on and on again stuck in this situation
What is the point in this confusion?
This situation
This tribulation
This miscommunication
To be
Misheard
Misled
Misunderstood
The unlikelihood of being OK
Yes, yes maybe one day I can smile again
And pretend that I'm better off
I mean, what is another broken glass?
But sadly, that might sound easy
But it's difficult for me.
I have these idiotic tendencies to get close to what endangers me.
With each shard I pick up with this hand
Another drop of crimson liquid will land.
Blend together with the salt falling from this man.
Maybe we can fix this somehow, maybe this will be OK
But then again is this all a waste
Is it worth all this pain?
Oh but its too late now, the glass is stained
With the color that comes from the heart and out through the veins.
With each meticulous step we take
We piece it back together again
Hand in hand
Blood and tears
We will put it back together again
But will it be the same?
Of course not, a broken glass will always show its cracks.
With lack of care it shall crumble back
To what it use to be
Unless you care for it tenderly
Then the crack shall transform into beauty
And it will show the point where fantasy becomes reality
But one must be careful with such fragile things
After all,
There's a fine line between love and hate.

The Angel Boy

I thought I felt a feather,
Gently stroke my cheek,
I thought I saw a model,
Strutting down the street.

I thought I heard an angel,
Whisper in my ear,
I thought I smelled an ice-cream van,
Coming up near.

I thought I ate an apple,
Juicy all the way,
I thought I saw you notice me,
You really make my day.

Untitled

no matter what I do
no matter what I say
it's never enough for you
when you see me cry you still scream
when you see me duck you still swing
all the hatred you have for me I have some for you too
I just never revealed it
'cuz even though you cause me pain I l dont want to do that to you
if you knew that would you still treat me the same?

What Am I

I am not a loud person, nor am I free-spirited.
I am not ghetto, nor am I very popular.
I am not the smartest, or the most talented, or the prettiest,
so what does that make me.
Each person is reflected by their identity, or is represented by something, so that must make me one who has nothing, and a reflection.
I am a reflection of the people I see everyday, for I had the opportunity to be one of them.
I'm known only because I am quiet, but that's not a lot, anyone can be me, just look, listen, and do nothing, waiting for your dreams to come true and wish for all you could be.
I missed the chance to make it in the crowd,
though I try to be different, I still want to be accepted in the inside.
Where I am at, oh my options are low, I still try to make something of myself, though my application of acceptance was denied.
Now it's too late, I waited too long, but no matter what anyone says, my spirit is still alive.
Still, there is still a thought deep inside that my file of life is already filled with denial, my records filled with lost opportunity, and my file reads unkown because I never made it to be someone.

Finally

Can I
Look into your eyes
And you say you're mine
I heard the lies
And felt the pain
Always been hurt
And left out in the rain
Please don't do this
If you really care
Please don't lie to me
My heart you will spare

My Thoughts

You're the one who makes me want to scream
You're the one who makes me want to change
You're the one who makes me want to be better
The one who makes me want to be smarter
You're the one who causes all my pain
You're the one that makes me want to smile
You're the one that makes me cry at night
You're the one I wish that I could be
You're the one that makes me want to be less
less perfect
less happy
less me and more useless
You're the one that makes me feel bad for thinking
That I don't need to be with someone
For being able to think that when you cry because you can't do that
You're the one that makes me want to look inside of me
And pull out all this grief and burn it
You're the one who says "no" because it would hurt ten times worse
But would it if it's not a part of me
Why do you cringe when others laugh?
Why do you take a step back?
How can you smile when others frown?
How can you live with yourself?
You're the one I'd like to be
You're the one who makes me want to be me
But you're the one that makes me want to change
You're me

Auf Wiedersehen
(literal translation "to seeing you again")

I gaze into the Viennese sky
I look up at the moon as I cry

I can see your face gazing down upon me
Your beautiful eyes so gleaming

It is the hard for us both to be apart
But we both know this country owns a part of my heart.

My soul resides here
Even when we are near

The Austrian summer winds whisper in my ear
Your voice I long to hear

Summer thunderstorms and lighting strike
To bask in your warmth I would like

In Salzburg I see a white dove
How I wish it could bring this note to the man I love

Divided by east and west
will our love withstand the test

My heart's devotion for this land filled with culture and history
Leads me to believe what will come of us is a mystery

Of you in my arms in the Alps I dream
Summer is fading to fall it seems

Soon I will be coming back to you
Austria I will see you once again when the year is though

Two loves...Only one life to live
To whom will my destiny give

Auf Wiedersehen will be my farewell remark until the day
I can love you both -I pray

Untitled

From the ocean breeze
to the winter freeze
From blazing hot sun
to men with giant guns
From the Atlantic Ocean
to your heart's emotions
he that sees, sees from above
he that cares, cares with love
he that knows, knows everything
he that is happy his happiness will sing
he that feels your tears
feels it with cares
he is human he is men he is us

Vinco Vincent

Now I look back at what we could have done.
Now I regret not letting you.
Call Vincent.
With such a sweet face.
Tell him I know my lines. Lines on his face.
Does he know his? It's just a show.
A little fun.
There goes Vincent.
Moving towards the girls with easy faces.
He takes life easy.
Easily flattered.
Easily a heartbreaker.

A Promise To Myself

I have a plan,
Because I actually have a chance,
I'm not in jail,
I'm free,
I'm going to expand in me.
I'm going to succeed; it's a need,
It's a priority,
I'm not pregnant,
I'm not going to act on my arrogance.
I love boys, but Iëm not a toy
Some just want to play, but they want to listen to not a word I say,
For there, they use me and one day, suddenly vanish.
Leaving with everything I cherish.

For You

For you I would climb
the highest mountain peak
swim the deepest ocean
cause your love is what I seek

For you I would cross
the rivers most wide
walk the hottest desert sands
to have you by my side

For you are the one
who makes me whole
you've captured my heart
and touched my soul

For you are the one
who stepped out of my dreams
gave me new hope
and showed me what love means

For you alone
are my reason to live
for the compassion you show
and the care that you give

You came into my life
and made me complete
each time I see you
my heart skips a beat

For you define beauty
in both body and mind
your soft gentle face
more beauty than I'll ever find

For you are the one
god sent from above
the angel I needed
for it is you who I love

Love or to Hate

You hurt me every day
But I still love you anyway
You always make me cry
And you make me want to die
But you can also be cute and nice
My love is like gamblingóyou hold the dice
With one bad choice, one bad call
You can make me sad and make me fall
But no matter how much I push and yell
I am still locked under your spell
No matter how much I try to get out
I cry, I scream, and I shout
I always feel like I'm locked up here
But you do have a side that can be sweet and dear
I hate you
But I love you too

Dare to dream

Let's look into the sky
Dream of the future
Or what we'd look like.

Let's chase the clouds
Racing across the boundless blue
Slip between our fingers.

We wouldn't care.

Let's imagine a sea
Of wishes, dreams, endless truth
Feel the water run down onto the earth.

Let's go far away
To the land of make-believe
To open our eyes and make us see.

We would find everything we need.

Let's take each others hand
And
Dare to dream...

Untitled

Roses are red, violets are blue
I like this guy, how ëbout you?
He's hot, he's cute
And he's warm as sunshine
I love him, he loves me
I like him just the way he is!

Untitled

I know it's been a while since you discarded me, but I can't stop reflecting back on you.
You're in my dreams and sometimes wish you were here with me in my room.
I thought by now I would forget about you.

You're so sweet and cute, but sometimes even hurtful.
Those braces, those eyes, and the nights you make me suffer and cry... Make me wanna die.

Whenever I see you I get scared. My heart starts to beat faster and faster as if I were on a crazy roller coaster ride going faster and faster!
When I go to armed I always tend to feel down, but once I see you I say to myself wow!

Every day I see you, I know I'm going to have a good laugh
And whenever I don't see you I get worried and sad because I sort of know about your past.
I know this poem might not mean anything to you but just keep this in mind...
I really really like you!

I Just Want

I just want someone to hug
someone to hold and say I love you
I just want someone to care for
someone to smile at
I just want someone to kiss
when the ball drops on New Year's
I just want someone
I just want you

Feared or Loved

To be loved more feared,
or feared than loved
two people who belong as one
that are ought to be both feared and loved
but as if it's difficult to be as one
Betrayed the ones you love;
instead the ones you fear
and it may tear you apart as long
as you know that the love you
had before is still in your heart

Untitled

As I awake
I know my life will soon be at stake
I need to hit the streets
Beat the heat
Hit the mall
Walking chin up and tall
Armani, Prada, Chanel, amor
All of the stores I absolutely adore
Quick stop at Panda Express
Walk into GuccI as I stare at a pair of peep-toe pumps which I start to caress

This Boy

this boy I see every day I picture him to be the one
every step he took I could see the sun
a football player could get anyone he wants
but probably he couldn't be the one
him and his girlfriend walking through the hallways holding hands
and telling each other funny stories
can I say I sit in the shadow waiting to pull me from the dusk and willow mellows
I see u boy every day try to do everything 4 u 2 notice mebut it seems u and me weren't meant to be
sit here again I wait in the corner of darkness
to find someone to pull me out and bring me to the lightness

January 2007

Confused

That one look from you
was unforgetable,
Can you blame me not
to resist,
But sometimes I feel
invisible,
Like I don't even exist.

From the day I met you,
Till this very day,
This isn't true,
Man oh man no way.

You make me feel
awkward,
You make it feel good,
You make me feel alive,
You make me feel the
way I should.

Flitter Flutter

My heart is pounding one by one
I am shaking all or none
It feels like it weighs a million tons
Just because it has no fun

Flitter Flutter, Flutter Flitter what is going on will it shiver?

Floating on a cloud in the air
there are no doubts that it will be there.
I can see that it is hurtin' on the inside
it knows it and cannot hide

My heart is pounding one by one
I am shaking all or none

hurry, hurry, it is out of control
I love you that is what was foretold

Time Thief

pull yourself together.
grab your name on the way out.
if you smile when the guilty go free;
then tonight I'll share all doubt.

might break you into puzzle parts
so I won't spoil my appetite.
just deposit you like phone credit,
until I get the number right.

picking words like lightning bugs
freeing weaker ones to grow.
so I'll know just what to say to you,
and maybe you'll choose to go.

and for the record, it felt better,
just living life from where I sat.
and I would just give it all to you;
but then why would I do that?

so from better curiosity
crept something rather calm.
you thought I said "goodnight" again,
but I tried to say "so long."

Untitled

love is...for the sods

when hearts are shaped like a like a beautiful rose
it is not a heart
for a heart is shaped like a fist

when the chocolates you eat make you dream
check them they might be full of fizzy

when love songs make you blush
are you sure you're not just sick?

and if you think my poem is lovely
you definitely are sick

One Goes, the Other Stays

Off to war, two friends go
Maybe to better themselves
But we will never know
Many wars they fight
They see many men go down
But the friends' hearts are still bright
Yet that brightness goes out
During one single battle
Full of doubt
For a friend falls in pain
The other rushes to his side
The one at the side cries out in vain
As the other's eyes fade
The one in pain goes to the land of peace
His eyes once jade
The one not gone
Picks up his dear friend
And walks ëtil dawn
And at dawn
He buries his friend
The one that is gone
And from this weighs
A great burden
For one goes, the other stays

Sweet Embrace

When will I receive that blessing
Arms around you
Sweet embrace
So much to feel

Do I want it
I want it so bad
Sweet embrace
So much to feel
With you

When will I find it
The x
The hidden treasure I long for
In you
You are it

Love me
Bless me
With your sweet embrace
Because I
Feel so much with you

Feelings

I wish I could tell
Feelings felt
Dreams dreamt, Thoughts thought
I wish I could tell loves loved
Expressions expressed
I wish I could
Wish
To love and be loved
Beloved
And tell

Us

I want
You
See my deepest depths
Inner soul
Heartfelt love
See me as not me
But only
Me
Not this or that
But it
Love
Words not expressed
I wish
I could
To you

Guts

Guts

Gotta get some

Wish I had them

If them would be had

Then you would be got

Love Wanted

Break it
Shatter it to pieces
So I can say
I have
Had
Love

Even if it hurts
I need to have it
Just one time

Trying

I long for the grief and inspirational move within your touch
My momentous and bitter time is running out of faith
I try to make it worth it all but you always push me away and...
I sit here and wonder why you are this way

I give in all that I have to make you smile or laugh but you're consistantly driving yourself to a place that I am not welcomed to

Your defensive and selfish are sensitive
And I no longer are sure when to approach or even look at you
I try to set your notions aside in any possible way but...

I try to forgive myself for causing your insanity
I try and try and try time and time again

Every time I try to get close I end up getting in a distance
I muse on it because you are never in the mood for me

Now I sit here in the darkness of your shadow and the weltered wall you've constructed between us
Trying so hard, with the tears within my heart and weakened body, trying to show you better and...

You push me away and leave me hopeless
Solemnly simple with your complexity and distraught way to persuade me otherwise
As like the lies I hear from you.

I'll Try

The more days that have passed me by I sit patiently thinking of different ways to try.
To try I mean aim for perfection asking if you're the one for me is out of the question.
I abuse my privileges by always calling to find where you are sometimes seems like I'm stalking.
I just don't want done to me what I had done to you because it hurt like hell to find out the truth.
I admit I was wrong and I never should've lied but I hurt so much deep inside.
I love you to the fullest and it should never change because I am here and always staying.

Seeing It Differently

a rusty nail embedded in gold
a muddy lake, my swimming pool
an eaten fruit, a fulfilling feast
a pimpled face girl, his true love
we see it differently but we are all the same

a cardboard box, their home sweet home
two bruises and a scar, her body's tattoos
forbidden liquid, his addiction
yesterday's gossip, her today's pain
we see it differently but we are all the same

nine inch heels, her working shoes
a creepy hospital, his new room
a wooden cross, their savior's death
a loaded gun, his last breath
we see it differently but we are all the sames